back to the past

dan kembali lagi kesini. gatau kenapa ya selalu ngerasa beda kalo balik lagi kesini sama apa yang dirasain di jogja. kaya ada yang masih ketinggal gitu disini. abis gimana, lahir disini, udah kebiasa sama keadaan yang kaya gini dan tiba-tiba harus adaptasi lagi sama keadaan yang bedanya bener-bener jungkir balik ! (lebay tapi emang gitu). umur baru 8 taun, mama meninggal, harus tinggal ga sama papa, sama adek juga pisah, bener-bener belajar bertahan ditempat yang kayanya sebenernya ga nerima aku. capek, makanya tiap aku balik lagi kesini males rasanya mau pulang. harusnya aku disini bukan disana :')

cryin' laughin' smillin' FRIENDSHIP

i miss you, the old you 

I MISS THE OLD  YOU, HEEEEY DO YOU HEAR ME ? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ?

I MISS THE OLD YOU ! MOODBOOSTER !

I MISS YA daniel hernanda :')

N Y E S E K

you know what it feels like? It was like chewing gum that is no longer sweet and then thrown away :')

do you know what I want to do now? I want to scream. ya, I just want to scream. shouted out loud! that's all I can do to show what I feel now. I want to keep everything but maybe this is too difficult for me to do. I was wrong. all my fault with my childishness that made myself scared. I can not give you confidence, I'm always afraid that you have someone other than me, I always suspected you still have a relationship with her. I was always afraid you'll leave me. I'm afraid. I feel it's all because I'm only afraid of losing you. but I know all of that is an option and all have the right to vote. I just want you to be happy.you can get better than me :")

i'm sorry to hurt you, i'm so sorry about it :')

MT MT MT MT MT

instead of just two letters that do not mean anything. but it is two things that have and will always do for me. give me a smile and throw away my tears. it would do for me.

STOP. NO MORE NOW :')

mau nangis, pengen teriak, kalo boleh lari sampe tempat mama.

indeed if I compare with him much difference. he's much better than me. in all things. I'm not nothing when compared to him. perhaps, you also should not be with me now, but with him. sorry, maybe I spoil everything. sorry, I'm so sorry

udah mau setaun tapi masi gini-gini aja. aku yg aneh apa gimana si ini -.- bingung harusnya gimana :( pengennya semua berubah. aku, bukan kamu. kadang masi ngerasa takut, ga bisa percaya sama skali. pengen ga ngerasain itu lagi. capek ngerasainnya. tapi ya gimana, susah :( susah buat percaya, takut kamu boong. padahal gamungkin juga :O gimanaaaaaa yaa

takut takut takut takut

Tuhan aku takut. aku gatau kenapa bisa setakut ini. sampe kebawa mimpi. Salah. emang aku yang salah dan mungkin ini konsekuensinya dari Tuhan. tapi aku gamaau gamau gamaaaaaaaau :(

aku gamau Tuhan. aku gamau itu aku gamau takut lagi aku gamau ga tenang kaya gini :(
Tuhan tenangin akuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu :(

ini namanya belajar

grateful to learn though always short
learn to understand although not accord
sincere though not willing to learn
learn to be patient though not strong
learn introspection although it is never wrong

i miss it (⌣́_⌣̀)

it will feel different when I saw these photos. like a mirror but the size difference AHAHA. I miss the days like that. while I still have a backrest that is always ready when I need them. when I can get everything I want. when I can laugh at any time. I missed it all. I miss the most is when I get a hug that is most comfortable when I dropped a tear. embrace that now I can't get anymore. I can play with my dolls, play all day without thinking about things that are now a burden for me. that exist in my mind just what to do tomorrow with my friends, what would mom and dad brought home from the office for me, today I will go anywhere with them. DRAWING, PAINTING, SINGING, DANCING, that's what I did in school. no ALGEBRA, MATRICES, INTEGRAL in my brain at that time. CRAYONS, MARKERS, DOLLS, PICTURE BOOK, only that the contents of my school bag. instead of the books two or three centimeters thick. god, if Einstein created a time machine to go back in the past, I would buy it and use it to go back to my childhood. I will make my mother back to world. or if I could create a machine that, I will soon be creating it.

I REALLY MISS MY CHILDHOOD !

these photographs when I was a kid \(´▽`)/

semoga selamanya ya ! 

ya , semoga !

amin :*

mybest

Anak Agung Ayu Putri Paramitha Saraswati Karang

Asvita Kharismaningrum

Daniel Hernanda Chandra

Ayu Anisa Fitri

Devina Anisa Putri

Adelia Talitha

Dafino Rizky

THANKS ALOT :)

try and be

never before like this. learning to get serious, understand the situation and shortcomings, and learn to defend something that we have. do not know what pushed me to be like this, but I can learn to try to be BETTER for the person and continues for all the people around me. for you, thank you've allowed me to become more mature, do not always think like a child. thanks already made ​​me better :)

DOMO \(´▽`)/

lagi suka domo eh \(´▽`)/\(´▽`)/

boring points = complete

finally, I can get through the point of boredom in my life. bored with the current situation. away from parents, there is a problem with a friend, with someone as well. but everything is finished. now I just need to continue it.  

\(´▽`)/\(´▽`)/

I have them there-

sometimes we feel we are nothing. sometimes we feel we are nothing compared to others. but we never realized that God had created each of us with excess. may not realize it but we are not yet aware of it. someday we can surely realize what God has given to us. including me. maybe yesterday I could not realize what is in me which is different from others. complain, envy, that's all I could do if I see or feel there is someone more than me. but now I can realize it. I have great parents. two midgets that sucks but because there they could I get angry every day   : D my friends are always there whenever I needed them. and I have someone who is always there beside me, I'm proud to have them all. but I'm much more proud of the God who has given them in my life right now : ")

thx GOD | my dad | #DIO #DEEGA | all of my friends | especially my DHC :*

abis edit foto :D

                                                                                    

                                                                                     at my area :)

                                                                  at pakuwon city :D

                                                                     my uniform :)

:')

dengerin lagu yang sama, ditempat yang sama juga. tapi keadaannya yang beda. kalo dulu denger lagu ini berdua sama dia, sekarang aku denger lagu ini sendiri. dia ? dia juga denger lagu yang sama tapi ga sama aku lagi :)

-gigi - sang pemimpi-